Goodbye, 2014.

So I realise making this post about a week into 2015 may seem a bit silly but regardless I still want to make it. I believe 2014 has been a very important year for me as I've realised a lot of desires for myself a made a lot of changes. 

So here's a small collection of things that I did/happened in 2014;

1. I started work

Now, i've actually had a job since about half way through last year but because of my age my hours were restricted but as soon as I had my birthday this year that all changed. Some weeks I was working a mere ten hours and other I was work 25 hours plus on top of going to school, which honestly lead to exhaustion. During my last few weeks of school, meaning exams, My workload was pretty extreme at upwards of 23 hours a week. I was constantly exhausted, coming home only to study and sleep. I had rarely any time to myself, which was rather unpleasant because I draw my energy from being by myself. But though out all of this I learnt how to properly balance time and how to deal with all different types of people and situations. I'm now far more relaxed when meeting people and able to make conversations straight away. I also now earn my own money, which I have 100% control over as my parents don't believe in controlling money that I myself have earned. 

2. I Realised that I Can't Control Other People's Actions.

When you write that down, it seems like a honest no brainer but it's actually quite a harder concept to grasp. Learning that I can not control what other people say and do mades it far easier for me to realise that they are not my responsibility, meaning that the consequences that come from those words and actions have nothing to do with me and I find it easier to make healthier friendships now.

3. I Got Rid of Toxic Friendships

Towards the end of the year I removed myself from a pretty toxic friendship by slowly distancing myself from that person and beginning to hang out more with others. I just realised that I didn't want to be in the friendship anymore and that it had become toxic, I was unhappy and annoyed and all we ever seem to do together was complain about others; which wasn't healthy. It's not easy to remove yourself from these friendships but it's so worth it when you do; trust me.

4. I Made the Changes That I Wanted to Make

Even if it was as simple as wanting to become more organised; I did, or at least I took appropriate steps towards doing it. Even if I didn't do it right away, I started to make the effort and to me that's really what counts. I also found that by doing this I stopped blaming others and took more responsibility; a change that for me was long overdue and something that only I could do.

5. I'm Taking Control of My Future

And I say this in the present tense because it's still happening and it's something that I believe will continue to happen for a rather long time. By realising/doing the last four steps, I've effectively began to take control of my life and my future and I'm excited for where i'm going and what i'm going to do. The worlds a big place and what I know now is only the beginning; i'm going to continue to learn and explore for a long time and I hoping 2015 will bring many opportunities for me to do so.

So in summary 2014 was kinda big, or at least the second half of the year was the first half was pretty painful and lacklustre. I'll call 2014 the year of revelations because I finally realised some pretty important things and I was in the process of making some pretty big decisions.

I hope 2015 will offer me many more chances to be myself

Till Next Time;

Madeline.